{"id":5188,"date":"2021-02-17T11:18:57","date_gmt":"2021-02-17T19:18:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.sqlskills.com\/blogs\/paul\/?p=5188"},"modified":"2021-02-17T11:23:00","modified_gmt":"2021-02-17T19:23:00","slug":"some-thoughts-on-courage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sqlskills.com\/blogs\/paul\/some-thoughts-on-courage\/","title":{"rendered":"Some thoughts on courage"},"content":{"rendered":"

(This is also the Ponderings – editorial – in today’s SQLskills newsletter<\/a>.)<\/em><\/p>\n

I want to start out this post by sincerely thanking everyone who emailed me or commented about depression, after the last newsletter\/post<\/a>. It definitely seems that there\u2019s a lot of it about, from situational depression (like I think I have \u2013 doctor video appointment this afternoon!) caused by the traumatic last 12 months, or long-term depression that some of you have told me about, including close friends about which I had no idea. All the supportive messages are much appreciated and I think I\u2019m slowly on the mend.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

One thing that stood out for me was the number of people who thanked me for having the courage or bravery to speak out publicly about my feelings. I really had no idea that there was so much stigma attached to an admission of depression in wider society. I honestly didn\u2019t think I was being brave, I just thought it would be helpful for others in the community to hear about a problem that they might be suffering from too, possibly without realizing it. I\u2019m a pretty open person, and used to sharing thoughts and feelings here and places like the newsletter, Twitter, and Facebook, but now I understand the stigma, and I understand the comments.<\/p>\n

My Mentoring Class of 2020 has been patiently waiting for replies in email threads for a while, as I\u2019ve been dealing with things this year, but I\u2019ve already seen some great examples of courage from them, which might show some of you that it\u2019s possible to do what you\u2019ve been scared or concerned about doing.<\/p>\n

Public speaking: several people want to start speaking at user groups but are scared of public speaking. I used to be too, and I still am when it comes to speaking about anything I\u2019m not *used* to talking about, or random questions in a live interview. I didn\u2019t really start speaking in public a lot until TechEd 2006 in Boston (where I met Kimberly!), and I agonized about it for weeks, and spent a lot of time training myself to not say err or um (write a long technical paragraph, learn it by heart, and then practice reciting it, starting over each time you say err or um \u2013 took me about a week on my hour-long commute to Microsoft). Some people say the most frightening thing for them is public speaking, as you\u2019re laid bare for all to see. The more you do it, the easier it becomes, but I still get butterflies before any public speaking. And I say booooo to anyone who derides a new speaker for making mistakes.<\/p>\n

Changing jobs: I think 8 people from my Class of 2015 ended up changing jobs, and it looks like several of the Class of 2020 will as well. Sometimes it\u2019s a no-brainer because the current job is a dead-end, or the working conditions or benefits are bad, or the new job has much more money\/benefits\/responsibility\/something else. Sometimes it can be a leap of faith, so to speak, because you\u2019re not sure whether it\u2019s the right move or you\u2019ll succeed in your new role. I had that dilemma in 2007 when deciding to leave a very successful career at Microsoft to join Kimberly at SQLskills, doing training and consulting, that I\u2019d never done before, *especially* considering that I was a new public speaker. It turns out it was the best move I could have made, and I\u2019m glad I had the courage to leave Microsoft.<\/p>\n

And there are plenty more examples of things that require courage:<\/p>\n